AN ARSENAL FAN'S VAN PERSIE RANT

Came across this in the wee hours. Its soo hilarious but also honest.
Its a Fan of Arsenal ranting over Persie's decision not to renew his
contract with the club.

Trust me its a potential mind changer for Van Persie. Enjoy (•͡.̮ ~͡)



Brilliant. The initial disbelief, the questioning, the
eventual acknowledgement, the sarcastic tone.
Calling out van Persie's bullshit.


"Financial terms aren't my priority?! Ah, come on,
that's complete bull. That's complete bull, MATE…
You're sure the Barcelona or the Real Madrid guys
aren't sticking money up your ass?!"

(NOTE: It is highly likely that Barcelona, Real Madrid,
Manchester City, or whomever gets him, will, in fact,
stick money up his ass.)
"When the going gets tough the tough go get
more money. Are you fricking serious!"
I guess the saying is different in England. At least
LeBron took less with Miami than he'd have gotten in
Cleveland!
"Basically, you're saying Arsenal are crap. You're
saying we can't win any more trophies."
(Cavs fans nod silently in agreement…)
And it was strange timing, indeed. Arsenal is
notorious for NOT spending money on players, but
they had just made some key moves. They picked up
two talented strikers, a German, Lukas Podolski, and
a Frenchman, Oliver Giroud. This dude is a fan, and
he knows this. But he's wondering, has van Persie
been reading the blogs? Is he scouring the
Twitterverse? Does he read The Guardian? Does he
know the team is trying to get better? DOES HE
KNOW WE TRADED FOR ANTAWN JAMISON?!?
"PODOLSKI. He can score goals. He's German; he
knows what to do! We also scored that French
guy."
(How could you leave when we just got a German
man?!?!? He's German. Germans know what to do!
Their economy is thriving! Getting a German is like a
guaranteed championship!)
And then come the insults. No rant is complete
without personal attacks.
"You think you're better than everyone. You think
you're fricking Ronaldo or Messi. Sh-UT UP, MAN!
… Look how well you did in the Euros… Oh wow
you just scored one goal… BENDTNER SCORED
FRICKING TWO GOALS, MATE. TWO BLOODY
GOALS, MATE. FRICKING BENDTNER! FRICKING
BENDTNER. ARE YOU FRICKING MAD? ARE YOU
FRICKING MAD? BENDTNER. BENDTNER…
BENDTNER. BENDTNER, mate. BENDTNER.
BENDTNER, wow. BENDTNER.
(Nicklas Bendtner is another striker for Arsenal, one
who came with extraordinary expectations, but has
become a punchline. He was shockingly solid for
Denmark in Euro 2012. He's basically Joe Johnson, if
Joe Johnson had his same contract, but performed
like Johan Petro, and was loaned to another team.
Yeah, Arsenal fans don't like him. The 10 mentions of
him weren't hyperbolic; they were necessary.)
Then comes the inability to speak. And the
retaliation, video-game style. The dude goes into
FIFA, and sells van Persie from his "Ultimate Team."
But that's not enough. He buys him again, just to get
his hopes up. And then, boom. SELL. And if that's not
enough, buy and sell for a third time. PEACE, BITCH.
Finally, the conclusion, washing his hands of the
betrayed. "Disgusting." Oh, and van Persie still has
one more season on his contract. Imagine LeBron
announcing The Decision a year before his free
agency. And he announced it on his website. Yuck.
This. Is. Chaos. Good luck surviving a year of angry
hooligans, Robin. Hope you get a transfer, soon.